Standing up…. once again

I had been having a bad week. The most tragic thing that could ever happen to someone had just happened to me. As a small business owner, I was devastated. Nearly in tears, I sulked for a few days. Everything, all of my personal documents, my business contracts and overall life as I knew it had been on that zip drive and just like that, it had failed. I can’t remember the error message but all I knew is that there was no do-over. Once I’ve formatted the disk, I couldn’t take it back and I couldn’t open the documents either way.

Just when all faith had all but gone out of the window, one morning my tone changed. I wanted some fruit so I decided to go to the local supermarket (whose name I will not disclose) and
headed straight to the organic section. While picking up a bunch of fruit, (which I enjoyed more than anything I had ever tasted, they were so sweet!!) I heard the head cashier announce for “All cashiers CHECK please, All cashier CHECK! (Insert inaudible name here) COME TO YOUR REGISTER PLEASE! I NEED all cashiers to CHECK PLEASE!”

Right then and there it hit me… The sound of her voice hollering through the microphone was equivalent to blaring sirens to my ear. It was reminiscent of a cattlewoman calling to her herd…. And I didn’t’ like that feeling or that thought. I had always had a bit of a problem with jobs and the ‘wrong kind of’ authority. Respect was never a problem whether you were an elder or minor but working for someone was just not something I could digest for too much longer. I know I’m not the only one who felt smarter than her supervisors. Because I once worked for this company, I could personally relate to what having to go back meant: unmeaningful work, long hours, no place for advancement, and that’s just the tip of the iceberg. That moment, I snapped out of my nearly depressive state and I made a decision to deal with the hand I had been given. Yesterday is long gone; I can only control what happens today.

Perseverance wouldn’t let me walk away without a fight. I couldn’t imagine going back to a world that made me unhappiness. The whole reason I got into entrepreneurship is so I could create in my own way and set my own rules. I hadn’t come this far to give up so soon.

So as I write this blog, I have vowed to not spend another day feeling sorry for myself. I’ve learned the importance of doing more than one data back up; maybe even email the document to myself if I have to.  I had just discovered Florence + the Machine and I couldn’t wait to dissect her sound and recreate! Music was the only best friend that could remedy this and a new sound always bring on fresh, new ideas. Besides, I could right all those wrongs I did wrong the first time around. 🙂

“Fall seven times, stand up eight.” — Japanese Proverb

Modern Naturalista

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